He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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