How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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