Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
