something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
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