ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
