why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
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Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
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I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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