well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
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