I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
