now i know why i became what i already was.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
