i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
