At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
