Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
