i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
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