Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
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