im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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