My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
