i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
