They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
