what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
