Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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