i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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