I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Randomize