eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
