i don't plan on having that self control this summer
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
