I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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