paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
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