distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
