Non-Jews are for practice
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
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