He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
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