Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
accomplished twins. life is a go
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
