but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
