It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
