Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Did we literally take a cab across the street
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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