whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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