Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
