Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
