I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize