It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I showed him my bush... on skype.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
