My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
