Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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