if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize