Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
