in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
