So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
