this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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