He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Never underestimate the power of titties
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
