my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
