we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize