That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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