we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
