do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I deserve this hangover.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
